It’s true, I’m not mentioning climbing at all (except for just then). Just a mention of the bunny posters from kozyndan, that are somewhat cool and quirky. The one pictured is Bunny Blossom (seeing as the blossoms around here have just finished flowering, and now we have fresh bright green leaves everywhere, instead of dead and spooky trees). Although it’s worth checking the others out too.

Arghhh – this is all bad. I can’t do more than two pushups now; the lack of climbing is making my arm muscles melt away… I fought so hard to get arm muscles …. NOOOOOOO, the humanity!

Here’s a couple of photos from the kids back in Oz…

Heidi’s been in Payne’s Ford, NZ, and has since managed to come down with Scarlet Fever (I thought it was so 19th century, but apparently it’s cool again now) – Get better Hoidi! This is her on the classic ’1080′ route at Paynes – a 23 (5.11b) with “a 10m juggy roof with a cool batman rest 2/3 of the way across”.

And Jackie’s been all over the place, here’s a couple of her shots from Mt. Buffalo (Victoria), and the Blueys (aka. Blue Mountains, NSW).

Corey seconding up Peroxide Blonde (20) at The Horn, Buffalo

(more…)

DISCLAIMER

The Red Rocks Trip Report by Megan is a work of fiction.

Any references to real people, living or dead; and real events, businesses, organisations, and locales are intended only to give the fiction a sense of reality and authenticity.

All names, characters, places and incidents either are the product of the author’s imagination or are used fictitiously, and their resemblance, if any, to real-life counterparts is entirely coincidental.

(and it’s also very long)

(more…)

Another Australian holiday has come and gone while I’m not in the country. I should be getting all patriotic and cooking Anzac biscuits this weekend. (For the Americans, ANZAC stands for Australian and New Zealand Army Corps – Anzac Day commemorates the anniversary of the first major military action the troops were involved in during World War One – they are also yummy biscuits… or cookies, if you will.)

I was actually still in the country for Australia Day though (Jan 26th), so I got to hear the mild kerfuffle aroused when the following ad came out from Meat and Livestock Australia. Read by Sam Kekovich, who’s gained a reputation for doing these sort of monologues, a few people took it all a little bit too seriously (probably just the hippy vegetarians though, so that’s alright)…

There’s nothing worse than being un-Australian. I should know, I’ve been Australian all my life. And I’m sickened by the creeping tide of un-Australianism eroding our great traditions. Like our custom of eating lamb on Australia Day. Un-Australianism is everywhere. For example people wearing those plastic brightly coloured flip flop shoes with flowers on them. What’s wrong with rubber thongs in simple primary colours. If I hear another person say thong, when they mean those swimming costumes that pooncy Brazilian blokes wear up their bums, I’ll do my block. Sadly, the scourge of un-Australianism has even infected our national day. A balanced Australia day diet should consist of a few nice juicy lamb chops and beer. And perhaps a bit of pavlova for those with a sweet tooth. Yet your long-haired dole bludging types are indulging their pierced taste buds in all manner of exotic, foreign, often vegetarian cuisine. Chicken burger value meals, pizzas, a number 42 with rice. It’s an absolute disgrace. And people ask why we need capital punishment. Do you think the diggers in the trenches were fighting for tofu sausages? No. They were thinking of grabbing a lamb chop off the barbie with their bare fingers, sustaining third degree burns, then sticking their hands in a relieving esky to fish out a cold one. Look at our national song, Waltzing Matilda. It’s about a bloke trying to get a nice bit of lamb into his tucker bag, not spicy chicken wings. The soap avoiding pot smoking hippy vegetarians may disagree with me. But they can get stuffed. They know the way to the airport. And if they don’t, I’ll show them. So the message is clear, even for you backpackers. Roll out the barbie, ensure the gas bottles filled, stack the fridge full of lamb, and prepare the invitation list. So don’t be un-Australian. Serve lamb on Australia Day. You know it makes sense.

Oh, and courtesy of Barista, I’m becoming increasingly fascinated by this cover of Joy Division’s Love Will Tear Us Apart by the Russian band Yat-Kha. As he says, it sounds “like someone snoring into a didgeridu with a strong Russian accent”. Yet strangely compelling…

We went climbing on Sunday, at Annapolis Rocks, MD.

We climbed on rooves.

It was cold.

And it was snowing.

So we went home. The end.

Down the main street of Old Town Alexandria, there are two wig shops. Yes, that’s right, two. Apparently the residents of Old Town are particularly prone to hair loss. Maybe it’s the water. But whenever I walk down the street, I glance in at the wig shops. And every time, my eye is caught by this particulary dummy:

Is it just me, or is this a woman wearing a moustache? She cuts a very dashing figure, to be sure, but she also scares me. (And on a side note, her moustache is just a bit too long isn’t it? Eating or drinking would be fairly unfeasible)

[The door flies open and Cardinal Ximinez of Spain enters, flanked by two junior cardinals, Cardinal Biggles and Cardinal Fang]

Ximinez: NOBODY expects the Spanish Inquisition! Our chief weapon is surprise…surprise and fear…fear and surprise…. Our two weapons are fear and surprise…and ruthless efficiency…. Our *three* weapons are fear, surprise, and ruthless efficiency…and an almost fanatical devotion to the Pope…. Our *four*…no… *Amongst* our weapons…. Amongst our weaponry…are such elements as fear, surprise…. I’ll come in again.